Tuesday, April 30, 2013

4 months old

 
 
Dear James and Laura,
 
 
I can hardly believe you are already over 4 months old.  It was only a year ago we found out that we were pregnant-  we didn't even know we were going to have twins.  It is amazing how much our lives changed - but not in the obvious ways.  The new inability to sleep well even if you are sleeping, the constant thinking about you even when I don't realize I am.  My new obsession with all things traditional.  No desires for me and 1000s for each of you. 
 
 
James-  You started out as my quiet one.  Didn't move much, didn't cry much and happy as a clam alone.  That is no longer the case.  Right now you are in the stage of HAVING to be near someone.  Or held.  You prefer being held-  but not while laying down or sitting.  No, you have to be held while standing up.  You cry at the drop of a hat- if you can't reach a toy or if someone walks out of the room.  You aren't really rolling over much-  unless you are mad that you are alone.  You are quick to grab toys and things to chew on-  but also quick to drop them when bored.  You have surpassed your sister in weight - checking in at 13lbs 10oz.  You also LOVE applesauce.  We were given the OK to start solids-  so I made homemade sweet potato and homemade applesauce.  You like the sweet potato but applesauce is your main thing. 
 
Laura-  You started out as my fussy one.  You never did like to be held facing in, from the very beginning you wanted to see where you were going, not where you had been.  You are still like that.  You only just tolerate being held of snuggled, unless you are sleepy.  I love sneaking in your room and holding you while you are asleep because it is the only time you act pleased to be held.  Now while James demands attention you are usually content to just sit and kick and kick and kick.  You love bath time because you can kick and swim in the water.  And when we visited Uncle David's in Destin you loved the pool.  You are my little roller.  You hated to be on your stomach for so long but once you learned to roll from your back to your stomach you couldn't be stopped.  You use it to move around now -  if I leave the room for only a minute and come back you are rarely where I left you.  You don't cry often-  but when you do you mean it.  You stick out your lower lip to pout and I'm told that is something I still do ( I don't buy that though).  You grunt in anger-  and I do know that is me.  You aren't big on eating yet-  you make funny (or perhaps ugly) faces when given sweet potatoes and applesauce.  But we still play with it to see how you do. 
 
 
Both of your are amazing and I know you are going to test my patience and sanity at times.  But every moment has been worth everything we went through to have you. 
 
You both are definitely my sunshine. 
 
Love,
 
Mama 
 
 
 
 
Finally getting to meet you

Big Boy and Girl-  4 months old already!


Wednesday, January 9, 2013

It has almost been one month!!

Dear James Rutherford and Laura Maylene-

I can't believe it has almost been a whole month since you arrived!!!  It has been a whirlwind of activity and disorganized chaos that has left me little time to write letters to the children that I now know.

You were born on a Saturday morning on December 15.  James came first at 5:26 am- weighing 5lbs 4oz and 18.9 inches long.  Just a little while later came you Laura at 6:01am- weighing 6lbs even and  18.7 inches long.  Dr. Franz and all the nurses did an amazing job getting you both here and coaching your very reluctant mother through delivery.  I admit that I would have preferred a c-section, but now that it is over I am so happy that we went a little more natural route. 

The feelings that overcame me after each of your arrivals, the first time I saw you and the first time I held each of you can not be expressed in words-  but you will know them with the birth of your own children and trust me it is the most miraculous and amazing feelings you will ever have.  The instant love and amazement is a God-given miracle. 

I was induced into labor on December 13- exactly 8 months after our trip to Shands to have our 11 eggs extracted and two of those became you.  It was an amazing journey and I can hardly believe that this leg of the trip is already over.  It was the longest and quickest 8 months of my life. 

The both of you have changes our lives in ways we could have never imagined and I am going to enjoy the rest of our lives with you both. 

Love Your Eternally Grateful and Amazed Mother

It is Time!

Good Morning Twinsies-

Today is the day (well tomorrow will be).  Tonight we head to the hospital and begin the process of inducing you into the world.  I can't believe it.  It has been 8 months to the day that you were conceived-  the fastest and longest 8 months of our lives! 

Because your Mama doesn't do well with lots of people hovering around, asking questions and trying to be helpful when there really isn't anything to do, we are not telling anyone that we are going in tonight.  Hopefully be mid-morning tomorrow things will be moving along well and then we will call both sets of grandparents.  Plus most importantly for me and your Daddy is that it we will get to spend your first hours and day together as our own family-  learning how the heck to take care of you both! 

I'm not sure if I will get to write while in the hospital, but I'm sure your birth story will be well recorded before it is all said and done. 

Can't wait to see you!

Love,

Mama

Week 2 of Bed Rest

Well good morning babies-  you are being very active this morning as I sit here watching committee meetings on my computer.  My stomach is rolling and moving like crazy.  At first these movements really freaked me out-  but now I enjoy them.  I can sit here and watch them all day.  It is the one part of pregnancy I am going to miss. 

We are about to start week 2 of bed rest.  So far it is going well.  My blood pressure is staying down (relatively speaking) and so far no other symptoms have popped up.

I feel like we are getting close to meeting you.  I'm having lots of contractions each day (although not consistently) and at my last appointment I was showing signs of things progressing.  While I want you to cook as long as possible-  I admit I am ready to meet you both!!! 

Friday, November 23, 2012

34 weeks

Dear Babies-

On Thanksgiving Thursday I was 34 weeks-  but this week's picture was taken the day before. 

After a busy two weeks with the campaign, organizational session and the start of lots of meetings for work I have been looking foward to take the next week easy before the last committee week and what I hoped to be my last real week of working.  However, you babies may have something else in mind.

Wednesday we went to see Dr. Franz and I expected a normal appointment- in, out and on our way.  But it seems that my blood pressure has hit the "uh oh" level.  I thought for sure he would just tell me to keep watching it and since I am on weekly appointments now he would see me next week.  But instead he sent me to Labor and Delivery to go to the triage to be monitored.  After three hours I was sent home and thought I was in the clear-  my labs were good, my pressure was elevated- but not that high, and lots of movement from you babies.  I still had to do my 24 hour protein test, but since none of my previous tests showed any protein I know I was good to go.  But they told me I had to come back again 24 hours later to do all the same tests again. 

24 hours later- we left my Mom at home cooking Thanksgiving dinner and went back to the hospital.  Turns out my 24 hours protein test was elevated along with my blood pressure and suddenly I'm on bed rest. 

I have to go back to the Doctor early next week-  but everything I've read and been told is that once the pressure goes up and you fail your protein test it doesn't get better until the baby is born.  Preeclampsia is the official diagnosis- so now we play the waiting game.

You are both still head down, so chances are they will induce labor in the next week or two depending on how my blood pressure acts.  I thought I had plenty of time to get the last few things done-  but it doesn't seem like I will be able too.  I had really hoped to make the December committee weeks- but that doesn't look possible. 

Good news is that at 34 weeks there is very little chance of needing much NICU time and every day you continue to bake we are better and better.  I'm hoping I can handle bed rest for another 2 weeks (day one has not been easy or fun).  Regardless it looks like we are getting really really close!!!  Can't wait to see you!

Love,

Mama

Thursday, November 15, 2012

One call

Dear Babies-

There will be many moments in your lives where one event totally changes the course of your life.  Rarely will you know when they occur-  and it is often years later before you can pinpoint them.  After a long, sad and drawn out week and election I realized one of those moments in my life, and thus yours. 

In the summer of 2007 I was working for a Representative who, while a nice man, was done with state politics and about to resign his position.  This of course, would have left me without a job.  I was also dating a man, that again, while nice, was totally inappropriate for me.  I made the decision to start looking for a new job out in the Florida panhandle (I was still in Orlando) that would allow me to be closer to him.  I interviewed for a job with an agricultural organization that would have taken me completely out of politics- but back in an industry I love.  Even after the interview and follow-up interview I was torn about the position- but knew that if it was offered it would be best for me personally and professionally.  I remember, ironically enough, meeting your Dad at a Gainesville restaurant after my second interview and talking about the job.  It was the week his divorce was slated to become final- so we talked a long time about that and the possibilities of the job.  I left Gainesville that day knowing if they offered me the job I was going to take it. 

The next day they did offer me the job- at a salary a little lower than I had expected so I told them I needed a day to think it over.  I have no idea what I did that- I had never not taken a job that I wanted in the past.  God must have been sending me a signal. 

So, the next day I called the man back to accept the position, but he wasn't there and I just left a message asking him to call me back.  10 minutes later I received another phone call, this time from one of the men gearing up to run for my current boss' seat.  We talked about his race, his future plans and while he understood why I was looking for a new job, he would really like it if I stayed where I was, helped with his campaign and his future aspirations.  I didn't know him well, knew he was going to have a tough primary, wasn't sure if I would like working for him-  but again, God must have sent me a signal.  I decided to risk "a bird in the hand" for what could be.  At that moment I went "all-in" for this man and candidate. 

It was a long summer and a tough race.  In the end he won his primary election by 72 votes and went on the win the general as well.  Things ended between myself and the inappropriate boyfriend and when I went back to Tallahassee for that first committee week with my new member I ended up at a Christmas party at your Dad's house...I guess you could say the rest of that story is your history. 

Fast forward to 2012-  the elections on the state and national level are nasty and uncertain thanks to redistricting.  The man I risked my career on has done well in his job and is slated to be Speaker of the House in 2014.  Another long campaign that I am proud to be a part of.  But now, instead of not knowing him and wondering if I want to work for him I consider him a friend.  Someone I can turn to if I'm in trouble or need help- personally and professionally.  While I had moved on into a new chapter in my career I still felt like I was part of the team.  During the previous years I watched the media try to take him down time and time again- but he always persevered.  So while it was a nasty campaign thanks to the newspaper I had no doubt he would win.  The night of the election we were with your Dad's candidate and I had all of those Supervisor of Elections sites streaming-  he was winning (and I admit I had my doubts on that one).  I was watching other races that I was interested in with mixed results.  But I wasn't watching my friend's- so I was shocked when I got the first text saying things weren't going well for him.  The end result of that night, after recounts, is that he lost his seat. 

I know that you felt my pain for him- for the last week whenever I have thought about him, our history, the election and my anger at how he was treated I felt you both move-  or felt the contractions my feelings caused.  Even as I sit here typing I'm feeling one.  So I apologize for the undue stress that I put on you (but you're Spratts- so you have to be fairly hard headed and tough so I'm not too worried).  But why I am writing this letter to you is more than an apology.  It is a wish and a thank you. 

I wish for you many moments in your life that may seem inconsequential to you at that time but have huge impacts on your life.  I wish for them to be mostly positive, but I wish for you to experience some hardship too so you can know the value of good times.  I wish for you friends that are worthy of you feeling heartache for them, worthy of you crying for their loss- even days or weeks after it happens.  I wish for you relationships that inspire you to take risks with your personal life and your professional life and I wish for you the relationship with God that allows him to gently and often quietly point you in the direction to know who is worthy of those risks and who is not. 

And I want to thank you Chris, my candidate turned boss turned true friend for that one call- timed perfectly- that changed the direction of my life.  The call that brought me and Jim together and the call that allowed me have these babies that I can't wait to meet.  And I wish for you one call that leads you to the amazing things I know God has in store for you. 

Friday, November 2, 2012

31 Weeks

Wow....Time has flown by the last few weeks.  I can't believe that we are in the third trimester and while it still seems eons away before you both with be here it will be, at most, 7 more weeks.  ACK!!!  We have so much to do before then!

On a happy note your nanny has been found!  I'm so happy that we found an "old" family friend that is going to watch you both most of the time.  Angela and her husband Daniel have been friends of mine for years (since I first moved to Tallahassee after college).  I lived with them off and on during session as well and both your Dad and I have no fear about leaving you with Angela.  Plus you will have a built in playmate with their youngest son, Nolan. 

You both move around quite a lot now.  I can stare at my belly for hours watching it move as you move.  Baby A (who is named- but we aren't sharing just yet) is on the bottom and at our last doctor appointment was finally head down.  Your butt is in your sister's face, who is also named, and residing up higher in my uterus.  For whatever reason you both prefer the right side of my belly (and have all pregnancy) and it makes the left side of my belly somewhat flat. 

The last couple of weeks I've started getting tired again and moving, walking, bending, etc. is becoming hard to do.  Just a couple more weeks of work events to get through and hopefully I can rest until you get here. 

Signing off by sharing some pictures from our maternity photo session this week.

With much love,

Mama